So, its been a very long time since I have written an entry
in the blogosphere, and although I don’t exactly have the biggest of
readership, I always feel like a child who hasn’t done his homework when I
don’t write the blog. Saying that, I really was never very good with homework.
It seems so silly now, but as a child, that is literally your biggest worry
most the time, and even back then, I was unusually laid back about lists of
stuff that needed to be done. It drives Sonam mental, but I have a habit of
saying “yeah, I thought about that”, usually in reference to something that
needed to be sorted out, and once I have ‘thought about it’, usually my
internal IF function spits out ‘it can wait’. Little does she know, that is
actually an improvement from when I was a kid; I used to copy homework on the
school bus from some poor soul who, for reasons unknown to me, lent me his
work. But, back then, I never really even used to worry, just play championship
manager (rules out ‘cool’ for the reason of getting free homework), watch the
usual bits of TV, and go to sleep blissfully. I guess I am still
mid-transformation to becoming stress-filled/responsible. Anyhow, I always had
an ability to switch off completely from all my life’s responsibilities, and
even when I have about 3 responsibilities in the world, I am now unable to
completely switch off. That kinda sucks. But, if I did completely switch off,
then surely it’d just all be left to Sonam, in which case, surely my limited
ability to switch off is actually because I’m selfless? No, not really
convinced either. But anyway, the last few weeks have been brilliant.
Firstly, we flew off to Maui, Hawaii. It’s like nowhere else
we have been in the US, and given I refused to do any form of educated sightseeing,
I have no idea why it really is even part of the US. I’m sure whatever long and
hard battle for power there was worth it, because it really is stunning, and
brings with it a completely brand new culture, language and lifestyle. Even
though we didn’t do much exploring, it was so lovely to ‘get away’. I laugh at
myself saying that. I type here on a plane, jetting back to London after nearly
four months of not working, and Hawaii was a nice time to ‘get away’? But as
discussed in previous rambles, it’s so easy to get caught up in a routine, find
things that ‘must get done’, and however small the list, get preoccupied with
trying to make it smaller. Anyway, Sonam has been busy with job applications as
of late, and it has meant much of our free time is spent thinking about that,
at least until the holidays. We loved the resort. As we arrived, we felt like
luxury, pulling up in the Four Seasons, getting a garland and a special
cocktail, and I was thinking to myself, “it must be because I told them we were
on our honeymoon”, and I strutted to the main desk, and let go their terrible
pronunciation of my name because I knew they were about give me that free
upgrade to better suit the honeymoon couple. But then, in the corner of my eye,
I noticed the other 10 couples getting out the car, greeted in the same way,
and watched them all talk about their lovely celebrations (wedding, special
anniversary, joint birthday, whatever), and with that swift kick in the balls,
realized this wasn’t exactly a place we should expect to get special treatment.
I think it has to be one of the most expensive place I have ever stayed when it
came to extras. By extras I mean like food, or activities, or spa treatments..
I guess it’s a function of coming to the end of our trip, and hence the end of
our mental budget, but it took me a while to realize you probably had to be a
little more flash with the cash to belong in this resort. Anyhow, we did see a
couple of celebrities; the fat guy from Parks and Recreation, and James Marsden
(I didn’t know his name, but had to google ‘the young anchor guy in anchor man
2’). We had the most wonderful time there, the infinity pool was breathtaking,
with views of the beach, the endless ocean, and the whales flapping away during
sunset. We went scooter snorkeling (awesome fun), massages in the spa, a fun
game of tennis, and a schooling in basketball from Sonam. All in all, as fake
honeymoons go, it was amazing. (Yeah, you could technically call it a honeymoon
because we officially/legally got married, but we didn’t really think of it
that way too much as the proper wedding is in Feb, but once we said we were on
our honeymoon on the booking, we kinda had to stick with it. To make matters
worse, I couldn’t help but feel conscious of the fact I didn’t have a wedding
ring on, and then thought they must know, and that I must look like a hoax.
Which I kind of was, but still, I wanted to carry around the marriage
certificate, just incase). Anyway, I definitely would love to go back to
Hawaii, 4 days really is nothing there!
Next stop; Mexico! After a brief stopover in LA again, we
continued our holidays by heading south into Mexico. After originally planning
a trip to Cabo, much googling later, I was swayed to booking a trip to
Zihuatanejo. Now, yes, that is the place from Shawshank Redemption, but as I
read it was the quieter, more peaceful option, with no one hassling you on the
beach to buy pieces of junk made out of other pieces of junk (see post on
Venice Beach). Zihuatanejo really was phenomenal – although one complaint is
that I expected all the food to be like that of the Mexican food in LA – all guacamole
and sour cream and beans! As it turns out real Mexican food is different, yummy
and a bit like corn-infused, mild, Indian food. Anyhow, the resort we were staying
at was phenomenal, with only 4 rooms in the place, we had the most breathtaking
views of the Pacific ocean, it was 30 plus degrees every day, with barely a
cloud in sight. Check it out:
I think it has to be one of my most favourite places we have
ever been. To be honest, the resort wasn’t perfect, the breakfast wasn’t great,
even the shower didn’t have hot water. But, even with its imperfections, it was
truly perfect. Sonam and I had such a wonderful time, doing absolutely nothing,
not ‘having’ to do anything like on some holidays where you must check out the local whatsitcalled
or the thingymajigg. With no obvious attraction to go see other than the one on
our doorstep, it really was my perfect holiday. I couldn’t help but just look
out onto the seemingly endless ocean, and reflect on what has got to be described
as the most wonderful time of my life. Spending the last three months with Sonam
in sunny LA has been a privilege. I mean that in every way; not many are
fortunate enough to take a break like this in the middle of their lives, and I
feel genuinely lucky that Sonam and I have inadvertently been given our wish of
being able to travel the world together for an extended period, and go live
abroad for a while (one that I always promised Sonam that I would try my best
to deliver on, but always imagined things would be steady for me at my last
job, and hence wasn’t ever sure how that’d work out). Aside from the adventure,
getting to road trip along the west coast and seeing all the amazing things we
saw, everyone says being married is hard. Everyone says its all about
compromise. Everyone says its all about learning to be wrong when you think you’re
right. Well, having been with Sonam for over 5 years now, I really didn’t think
there were any surprises about marriage coming my way. And I was right, there
aren’t so far. But living with anyone 7 days a week, 24 hours a day, when neither
of you have a job, well that takes some getting used to. People just aren’t
used to seeing one person so continuously, no matter how much you love them.
But without trying to be too corny, I have to say the last 4 months have
brought us closer in a way I really didn’t expect, in a way that makes me feel
as comfortable around her as I ever have, and very aware of the imperfections
we both have, and very comfortable embracing them and living with them.
Anyway, one other thing the two weeks away was supposed to
provide was an opportunity to switch off my phone, and completely black out
myself from technology. But, annoyingly I didn’t make that happen. With the
visa interview needing doing, my Chicago apartment needing finalized, something
or other always needed sorting. I guess that’s something I’ll have to leave on
my bucket list for another break away when perhaps not so many things are in
limbo, but I suppose expecting that to happen is missing the whole point of
what I’ve been discovering throughout this break.
Back in LA, it was Christmas week, and we were packing again
(I swear, it constantly feels like I’m packing, something to continue getting
more extreme as we ship our life to Chicago). We had packed our freezer with
insanely low calorie meals from Walmart as we hit the ‘two months to go’ point
in our countdown to the wedding. As we realize we weren’t quite going to hit
our targets, we had two ways to go; keep trying or give up and succumb to what
was going to happen the day after the wedding anyway and just get fat. Inexplicably,
we have attempted to keep working at it, however futile it may be. So we just
spent our last week in America, hungry, but in wonder of the place we had spent
so long in, but had kind of passed us by at the same time. Quite simply, there
never really is enough time to ever feel like you know a place like LA.
Christmas in LA was odd to say the least, we initially sat
at home watching Home Alone 2, Trading places, and various other Christmas movies.
Then, in an effort to go see what we thought would be a quiet pier and beach
during sunset, we ran into what looked like the whole of Santa Monica crowding
out the pier and its arcades. Unlike what we expected, i.e. everyone being at
home having Christmas lunch, people seemed to be out in hoards playing arcade
games on the pier and eating blue candy floss, and some fluorescent blue drink
that looked radioactive when spilt on the floor. It was fun though, it was an
odd way to see people spend what would normally be a very ‘at-home-in-jumpers-with-family’
sort of holiday in my experience, but I guess when in Rome. We walked further
down Santa Monica beach, and stumbled on Muscle beach with all its hanging
ropes and monkey bars, and it was completely packed! All sorts of people, old
and young, had congregated on Christmas day to hang off some metal and do
things that I sadly have only been able to do while playing video games. One
especially weird place was right next door; a green patch of grass seemingly
cordoned off for the truly odd people, who were doing a variety of Brazilian martial
art dancing, yoga, and some extreme form of yoga that involves getting on
someone else who is in the middle of a difficult pose, and then while balancing
on them, you then do your own pose. And its not like there were just a small
group, there were a bunch of people just coming arbitrarily and jumping right
on each other, doing this weird sport/art form. I really don’t get LA, but at
that point I both admired it for embracing its weirdness completely, but also
just wanted to be sat inside looking out on a cold winters night and feel lucky
to be inside. Anyway, we ended the night with possibly the best take out food
we had eaten in LA, in a little whole in the wall Middle eastern place with
amazing bread and hummus, and we sat at home eating it while watching another Christmas
movie.
Boxing day was, well, non-existent in America, people don’t
really call it anything as far as I could tell. So after a quick work out, we
decided to finally check out the place everyone had told us to go check out for
sure before we leave; In and Out Burger. This fast food burger was supposedly
the best burger ever. Anyway, I in my naivety had expected a vegetarian option
to be available, and eaten nothing all day in anticipation for my one big meal
of the day. Turns out the veggie option available to me that day was exactly
like their cheese burger, but without the patty. So I got to try their amazing
lettuce and tomato in a bun with some of the special sauce and a slice of
rubbery cheese. I guess this goes on the list next to ‘best steakhouse ever’
that I’m not really equipped to judge on!
Anyway, as I head back to pack all my belongings and bring
them back to the US, I reiterate; this was the best holiday of my life, and
even with all the woohooing and over the top LA ways, and as odd as things can
be in America, and as much as I am going to miss the home that I will always
call London, I am excited to be coming back to restart this adventure in
Chicago. There is something so unique about life in America. As much as I don’t
like the media here, the image and brand culture, the emphasis on ‘America
being the greatest’ no matter what, and the fact that I feel the need to shave here
so people know I’m not a terrorist, there are things about this country I can’t
help but love. They love sports, they love food, and even when the do food
wrong, they do it in big enough portions to forgive it, where good service is
still important, and on the whole, it is an extremely warm and friendly
country, and a place where success is celebrated and not criticized for being elitist.
I can’t wait for Part 2.
