The calm before the holidays

It's been a while since I have posted on here, partly as I've been busy with Sonam's parents, and partly because, for a change, there really hasn't been that much to write! Sonam has exams tomorrow, and has had all these final assignments due, applications due, and with Sonam's parents here, I've been trying to spend time with them, and also help out with her stuff, so we can go away to Hawaii in peace. Ah thats right, we are off to Hawaii on Tuesday, to (hopefully) sunny Maui for four nights, to lounge around and look at the supposedly amazing landscape. Of the things on the top 10 list on tripadvisor, I'm excited to try Ziplining, Snorkeling, Dolphin & whale watching, but mostly just staying in a hotel on the beach where we don't have to do the bed, eat stupidly large breakfasts, and plop next to the beach for the afternoon.

As I typed that last sentence, I realised how if I was reading it as someone not me, I'd probably be thinking 'that sounds exactly like the life you have now'. And it probably should be, but it's odd how you give someone 1x of something to do, or 10x, and the same amount of time to do it in, given enough time to adapt, they're probably the same amount of tired at the end of the tasks (or at least they percieve it that way). I guess what I'm saying is, I've managed to find myself, other than playing host, caught up in errands, and trying to 'sort things' around me in order to 'relax and chill later'. Sounds kinda stupid, but its this human nature of just going 'OK, once I do this ONE last thing, I'll chill and everything will be awesome.' Except there's never an end to that list of things, and no matter how hard you try and how many bucket lists you make, people just fill their days and become domesticated whatever the scenario we are in, as I think that's kinda just the way we are programmed.

Saying that, I've been attempting to use this domesticated down time in our holiday to continue the exercise train. On the whole its going well - I'm still enjoying that boxing class, and the spinning (I've kind of just gotten used to the over-the-topness of it all), and I'm doing more running. Can't seem to force myself to go to the circuit training classes, but whatever, I'm trying. I can't say there has been a marked improvement visually, but I am feeling lots better, and before I go to Chicago and stuff myself with cheese pizzas after we are married, I hope to at least temporarily reduce the risk slightly of all those Indian genetic illnesses I'm bound to get.

Other than that I don't really have much to add - but there's two things that are strange about our floor in the apartment building we live in. Firstly, the floor always stinks, really really strongly, of weed. Which isn't really a big deal around here, you occasionally smell it on an evening out, or on the beach or wherever really, but its when it pervades into your home, stinking out your kitchen, and you can sort of taste it, it just pisses me off. Plus if I can taste it in my home, what the hell must it be like in that guy's home, it must be like some sort of weed fog that you cant see out of. Anyway, secondly, there's a guy on the floor, who for some reason just leaves his shoes out in the hall. Which didn't really bother me, but then something occurred to me; he only ever leaves out one pair, and the shoes he leaves out alternate (there are three different types of shoes he leaves out, slippers, trainers and work shoes- and they're always the same three), which means there must be somewhere in his home he is actually comfortable putting the other two pairs he seems to wear regularly. In which case, why leave these outside? Does he really have a shelf that only fits two pairs of shoes? And how dirty are his shoes? This area of LA is one of the cleanest areas I've ever lived in, so unless he is taking some scenic route through some muddy part of the beach, why can't he just take his shoes in? And what does he do to the other pair of shoes before he allows them to come in? Anyway, as I said it's been a quiet week or so, hopefully I'll have more from Hawaii...

Anyway, some nice pictures of what other new stuff we saw:

And a very strangely named restaurant.

Merchants of Venice

It's been an eventful few days since I last blogged, Sonam's mum has been here visiting, and her Dad recently joined us after a work trip. So amongst the usual bits and bobs of exercising, we have been trying to go out and explore new bits and bobs of LA.

One of the first trips we did was to Venice Beach - somewhere we had been to once or twice before, but definitely not seen it in it's entirety, we had just wondered around a couple of the touristy spots, and taken a couple of pics of Muscle Beach and the basketball courts where 'White Men Can't Jump' was filmed. As memorable as that was in how emasculating it was to see men lifting things with one hand that I couldn't bench press, it compared nothing to the stroll we had of what can only be described as one of the strangest collection of hippies, con artists and drug addicts I've ever seen congregate in one place. It's like a free freak show, just deluded people selling absolute garbage, whether it's advice on 'How to reset your chakra', or some bloke that has basically painted on a bunch of lightbulbs to make them more rainbowy and hippy-like, and has succeeded in two things; making them utterly useless, and then set up a stall trying to sell them for 20 dollars a piece. Next to him was a plonker selling incense stick holders. Just incense stick holders. But homemade balls of wood with holes poked in them. Is it a surprise I didn't see him selling incense sticks too? Of course not, as I'm sure he just found some balls of wood, and figured out how to hammer some holes in them. It's like saying 'Today I will sell this lampshade. I know there is no lamp to match this lampshade, but I am basically tying banana leaves into the shape of a cone, so please buy this lamp shade and stick it on something that currently operates as a bulb. Thanks.'
I saw a woman carving people's names into insanely small wooden blocks, a man who was as high as a kite offering to give you either a henna tattoo or a 'regular one', but with no sign of a needle or the ability to successfully put his cigarette in his mouth without dropping it. There was a middle-aged man just relaxing outside a cafe, in his speedos, belly hanging out and his bald head reflecting light like he was guiding ships to the coast. As he sat there reading his newspaper with way too much of his junk on display, infront of him stood his lowrider bike and a huge, real-life parrot, just sat there chilling next to his loopy owner. You just saw people wandering round yelling abuse at themselves, at random passers by, just generally behaving like zombies in an amusement park that no one was really paying attention to. There was a massive shop filled with what can only be described as hippy clothes. They sold literally one design, the one with lots of different circles going round like the typical image you might play in a film if someone in the 60s was tripping on some drugs, but just in different colours. It was one of the biggest stores we went past, and it just sold shit clothes for like 30 dollars a t-shirt, and I think being high was a pre-requisite to actually being able to buy anything here, but this didn't seem to be deterring people. I saw one woman who must've had about 8 t-shirts in her hand - Does she not have a washing machine? They're the same! Unless she is buying a uniform for her family/band/greenpeace group, I really don't know why you'd need that many. There was a blind man with so much hair that it was covering his face entirely, and he was playing the piano amazingly well. I'm actually not sure he is blind, but given that's the premice of his act, I think there is a bout a 60% chance he is not lying about that. I saw a group of teenagers dressed in aforementioned hippy gear, sitting there smoking weed, and basically begging for money with a sign that said 'Travelin on poetry'. Based on that spelling, I'm guessing poetry is a name of some drug they were smoking, as I don't know what self respecting person is donating to that group of idiots, not to eat or get housed, but by their own admission, paying them to go on holiday. The fact that someone would dare to ask me to 'sponsor' them to go on holiday pissed me off. It reminded me of the times I've seen people on my facebook wall ask for donations to a charity to go bungee jumping or sky diving. I'm sorry, bungee jumping and sky diving are things that people pay to do, and are fun and exciting, albeit scary initially, the whole point of the enjoyment is the fear followed by intense joy. So unless you're incapable of feeling the intense joy, or you have lost your arms and legs in an unfortunate accident, I'm not donating to some charity for you to go have a good time. I'd rather just give money to a charity. Why link things that are completely unrelated, and relatively speaking, not a challenge? Today I will be eating two pieces of toast with butter on - please click this link and sponsor me and help cure cancer! Erm, what? You sponsor someone to walk up kilimajaro, not to go to tescos, and similarly, I'm not sponsoring some well-intentioned idiot to do something that required minimal bravery, and something you'd do anyway.

The insanity continued as we walked down the street, and after a while the smell of weed just became something you didn't notice anymore, it was just everywhere. And I'm guessing that had a lot to do with the 'Medical clinic' painted in fluorescent green, basically selling medical prescriptions for weed. I wondered what they do when people with actual medical problems come in, perhaps the odd Chinese tourist who hadn't grasped the actual purpose of the clinic. I imagine Dr Dude isn't properly qualified in broken bones or actual medical emergencies. Saying that, you'd probably have to be high on drugs to mistake that for a doctors clinic, so you've probably ended up in the right place.

Another genuine sighting was a family of 5, one beatboxing dad, one little girl dancer aged about 3, one extremely tired looking boy aged about 6 dancing provocatively thrusting his hips out in weird and inappropriate ways, the mum sitting by the side of the road while moving her little baby around like it was also doing similar thrusting. They were all just dancing away to nonsensical beatboxing and singing from the dad while they tried to collect a few bucks in donations. I really hope for the kids' sake this was just one of their terribly poor taste hobbies, and not a way of life for them. As some passers-by found it amusing and/or 'cute', I just found it depressing. How in the world were those kids going to be normal/not a complete fuck up?

Slightly further down the road were two different desks of semi-homeless looking guys (semi-homeless doesn't initially sound like a thing, but here in California where income distribution is just something Communist Europeans do, plenty of people go broke and then go live in their car). Anyway, semi-homeless guys sitting there with signs up, offering advice for any one of your real world or spiritiual problems. These men, who haven't quite found a way to bathe themselves, fully clothe themselves, find a job or get over the need to have a drink at 10am every day - THESE men will sort you out. Tax issues? No problem, don't pay taxes. Just like Guru Dickhead over here. Health problems? No issues man, medical marijuana will sort you right out. Relationship problems? Just be your real you, and its all about love and peace. I dunno what these people would actually say, but here are genuine email addresses/ web addresses of the guys who were offering their help. Let me know how that pans out for you:

Guru number 1: shivadestroyer666@gmail.com
Guru number 2: nickythehealer.com - Having typed this in, I found him to be extremely popular online, a nutcase, but very popular. Apparently Britney Spears uses him. LOL

Zoltar at Venice Beach! 

Blind Piano player on the beach

Another update was that Sonam and I got married, officially! We still have our big fat indian wedding in February, but we needed to get an official, legal marriage at some stage, and before winter kicks in properly (which it has this week, there were clouds dammit, clouds!!), we thought we couldn't pick a more beautiful setting for a simple civil ceremony than on the quiet parts of Santa Monica beach located in Venice. It was beautiful, simple and quick, just how we always wanted it really, and although it doesn't feel MAJORLY different to be married, there's a subtle sense of happiness it brings, like a mini fist-pump sort of joy for getting something that you already sort of had. It's hard to explain, but it all feels really nice.

So once Sonam's Dad arrived, we decided to make a trip to Hollywood walk of fame. Even though I've been in LA for some time, I haven't at all felt the urge to visit this place, none of those words sound appealing; don't really like walking, don't really like the idea of being famous (rich but just under the microscope, so shit rich), and hence we haven't yet bothered. But with Sonam at uni for the day, I decided to take Sonam's folks to go do something truly LA. In summary, it was sufficiently underwhelming. It's kinda nice to be somewhere iconic, but it's just a load of stars on the road with famous people's names written on them. Pretty much, aside from the odd novelty store, that's it. It's the same reason I can't really get used to the idea of watching the oscars. I don't think I'd ever watch an award show for dentists or chefs, and I'm probably equally affected by movie people, why do we care who won? Surely it's only really relevant for someone who is an actor? Very similar for the hall of fame. And on that note, I kind of felt bad for the actors that initially got put in the centre of the hall of fame and then when your follow up film or tv show stinks, you get moved further along. How depressing! Like slowly being phased out of fame..

However, talking of depressing, I think the most depressing job I've seen out here has been found. As you walk around the walk of fame, these wannabe actors and actresses dressed in Halloween gear, imitating very poorly some random celebrity figure, one which requires as little skill as possible. Like Iron Man, or Spiderman, and they just try and shake your hand, make conversation, and try to get you to take a picture with them. If by some miracle that works, they then have to convince you to give them the 1 or 2 dollar tip. I guess I just can't imagine how depressingly aimless that job has to be. I mean, what's the best that can happen at a days work doing that? It's so loosely connected to what you want to be, and you have to dress like an idiot, behave like an idiot and then get paid peanuts while most people see you, think you're a loser, and then ignore you. I think I'd rather be a toilet cleaner, and that way just NOT get noticed, or have to dress silly, while the rest of the above still holds.

Finally, I was sat waiting for our car to be cleaned, and as with everywhere here in America, if you're gonna wait around, you may as well eat some sugar and salt and deep fried stuff. So lets just bung a cafe next to the car wash and pop the telly on. So, as I sat and ate my bagel with cream cheese (or should I say ate my tub of cream cheese with bagel), the TV was playing some 'Entertainment' 'news'. Yeah, I meant to put both of those words in quotes. Not really sure which part of bitching about people's dresses while these celebrities walk up the red carpet, kiss at the cameras like they love all those people on the other side of the lens and pose for the paperazzi, is entertainment. Or news. This shit is probably THE most braindead TV I've ever stumbled across. I think I may have learn't more, or got less wound up watching the actual fashion TV. But this was just complete, mind-numbing, infuriating, sums-up-whats-wrong-with-'News'-in-general, garbage. Three skinny mid 30s women, who are apparently PhDs in Bitching, all look at Rihanna or some other woman's dress (again these people aren't blameless - they dress insanely to get noticed, and stand around so people have time to capture all the madness so they can be part of Bitch TV the next day), and they say things like "Oh, I love Jenny, she is such a crazy cat, but a heart of gold, I love her. But this reaallllly didn't work for me, I really think she is just trying too hard and perhaps looks like she may have just lost some of her dress while getting out her car". Ok, I'm sorry, but you almost certainly don't know Jenifer Lopez, so you're almost certainly not on first name terms, and you definitely don't 'love' her, and you know nothing about her heart of gold, or anyone's there. Your information about her is compiled from idiotic magazines like People magazine and gossip columns on why Leonardo DiCaprio hates his kids because he seems to be growing his hair out (I dunno, but you get the gist). You have no idea who she is, you just said you liked her, and then to make yourself seems edgy and fun, you then went and gave her a nice little bitchy comment with some vague notion of fashion so it's not completely mean, and then had a giggle with dickhead 2 and 3 sat next to you. The fact people like that get paid, the fact this was on TV, the fact it's encouraged by the celebrities who get famous because of it, the fact people bloody watch it (WHY?! WHY DO YOU CARE WHAT SOMEONE WHO DOESN'T KNOW YOU WEARS TO A SHOW?!), all of everything to do with that just drove me mental. In summary, I hate 'Entertainment' 'News'.

Anyway, we had a lovely thanksgiving dinner at a place on Santa Monica beach yesterday, it was nice to finally get slightly involved in the tradition, even if it is based on a story of immigrant invasion and pillage of a people etc. But hey, I'm not American, I don't really know anything other than if it helps people be nice to each other, then great. Well, until today, Black Friday, when we all smash each others faces in to get 50 dollars off on a TV. Hell yeah!

Happy thanksgiving!

LA Continued..

"The end of the year is fast approaching". A common phrase, and a ridiculous, slightly nonsensical sentence, but one fairly apt for the last few days. As I booked our trip to Hawaii, it started to feel really close, which is bad for two reasons. 1) The obvious one - the trip is coming to an end, and even though it feels like we have nearly seen everything we wanted to on the West Coast, this feeling of sunshine and freedom is ticking away, and I keep looking at the date the same way I used to check my credit on my phone as a teenager; nervously. and 2) I'm not really in any better shape, and if this trip is nearly over, so are my hopes and dreams of being in shape for my wedding. Ah well!

On that note, it's not been for a lack of trying with the whole getting in shape thing. This week was mostly gyming, taking advantage of being in LA for a change, and although no more famous people spotted, we have been doing the only other thing to do in LA, which is exercise. We tried out the boxing/cardio/strength class, and although not kick boxing, it was incredible. Perhaps when you look at calories burned, it helps to already be kinda heavy, but according to the nifty Heart Rate gadget they attach to you, I burnt 900 calories approximately in the hour-long class, and I have to say, it was ridiculously hard, but lots of fun. Unlike the trainers at the circuit training, these guys push you a lot more, and do so without making you feel totally inadequate. It worked for me definitely, and they combined weights, cardio and boxing training really well in what turned out to be my favourite class yet. Plus it helps there was no search for "inner peace" at the end of the class. Almost didn't know what to do with myself without someone telling me how much over 100% I should be putting in to 'my life inside of here and outside'. I wish I'd discovered it a bit sooner, but I'll most certainly be heading back. 

The other thing I finally tried was going to the shooting range. I've had to be so careful how I word that experience after the tragedy in Paris, and it felt kind of insensitive to be going the day after the attacks, but at the same time, thinking about it rationally, its completely detached, and as long as I'm not posting pictures of me doing that while people are mourning, and simultaneously changing my profile pic to the France flag, I figured it was fine to go experience this seemingly strange, very American hobby. (Not to mention I'd quite like to live in this country, and a picture of me waving around an AK-47 probably isn't going to do me any favours.)

If you do watch the video, you'll agree it's just a little bit strange. It obviously sounds like what it would in a war-zone, something very hard to get used to. When I got there, I was a little bit in shock. The first few minutes, I couldn't stop jumping at the sound of bullets, and when we registered (took under 5 minutes to write your name down and buy some bullets), you just head to the range. What I was most astounded by, other than how busy and big the place was, was the extremely diverse range of people that were there. You had the stereotypical old white male with cowboy-esque gear on, but then you had biker guys, Chinese nerdy guys, young couples, groups of girls hanging out, parents who had brought their kids to just carry bullets and guns and what not. I'm sure it's mostly me being judgemental, but you read in the news how the proportion of the American public that the NRA (big pro-gun lobby in the US) represent is very miniscule. I expected it to be an equally poorly represented sample at the range, and it wasn't. Simon, the friend who generously took me there along with his friend, who will forever in my memory be known as 'mate', is an enthusiast. And knowing him for years, I know his interest in guns comes from nothing violent, but just a general interest in getting good at what is an extremely challenging skill, combined with the ability to do incredibly difficult things with better equipment. And, having tried it, it is very much something that's easy to get into. I enjoyed the challenge of aiming for targets, and I enjoyed challenging myself to get better as the day went on. Saying that, I think if you made any game hard enough, I'd be willing to try and get better at it. However, I will go as far to say I can see the appeal. It's a difficult skill, and playing around with these dangerous toys to hone that specific skill is challenging, and within that comes the entertainment. But the diversity of who it appealed to, and the plethora of guns and ammunition just lying around, all extremely easy to access, extremely easy to own, and although it depends upon the common sense of individuals to not screw up and do something stupid, the fact that people are trusted with that over here is, to me at least, mind blowing! We aren't trusted to walk across a recently mopped corridor in the UK without giving us a prior warning, but here in America, you drive up to this place, get your guns out, buy some bullets, and go for it. It's not like it's unsafe, its very very safe, but to a novice like me, I can't help but notice I'm surrounded by a load of killing mechanisms, and it just seems odd you'd allow us to take the risk. I dunno, it seems like a hotly contested topic here, and I'm no expert, but for whatever reason, the right to own your own gun seems to be very important to many Americans. As an outsider, I just don't get why you'd want to introduce that random variable in your society, when, to the average individual, its perfectly acceptable to just regulate it. 

Our friend Neeraj from Berkeley has been here the last few days, and was equally taken aback by the whole gun thing, but also equally entertained. We proceeded to explore Hollywood, Bel Air, Santa Monica beach, Beverley Hills all in the space of an afternoon. Having travelled predominantly with Sonam the past few years, I had forgotten what 'boyish tourism' was like (I have written that term a dozen different ways, but it still sounds peadophilic and/or gay). Anyhow, what I mean is tourism with a group of guys is very different to tourism with girls. With girls you have to tick off all the famous spots, go take a nice picture at the area, google the best food and drink places in the area, perhaps read something in the vicinity, even better, manage to be at the ideal spot at sunset, tag yourself on facebook when at the place, the whole shebang.. With guys, its more a case of having driven through it, and gained a brief idea of what it was (e.g. 'I think this bit is Hollywood'), and if it looks busy, keep driving/walking. This is until you see something very very cool, in which case perhaps try slowing down and taking a picture whilst driving past, all up until you get a) hungry - (which doesn't involve tripadvisoring the 'cutest spot in the area', but just seeing what the next place was after discovering you were hungry) or b) somewhere not so busy, so you can continue sitting down, but this time stationary as opposed to cruising around. So yes, much tourism was done on Sunday with Neeraj and his friend, so many sights and amazing parts of LA were discovered. But perhaps in a much more real sense, nothing was actually seen, other than the 30 minutes we spent in the coffee shop in a supermarket. It was a nice supermarket.. 

I feel compelled to at least mention the shootings in Paris, and without going into the complexities of it, I'd like to say it was extremely shocking to read about the terrorist attacks, even from all the way over here in LA. It is so sad and frustrating, and I've read so many half informed views out there that can only be viewed as one dimensional and hurtful. However, yes, its sad that people cared about France after the attacks more than those in Beirut. I wish it weren't that way, but I think it's human to care more about something closer to home, especially if in your mind, things like this happen more frequently in the Middle East. I don't think it's mutually exclusive that if you care about one you don't the other, and people that change their profile picture to support France aren't necessarily being unperturbed by that of Beirut. But people are probably not informed, or perhaps aren't as scared by it because it feels far away and in a land where this sort of stuff supposedly 'happens'. Yes, in an ideal world, it'd be nice if the same amount of press coverage was given to all human disasters, but there is a reason why celebrity gossip gets more newspaper space than the daily deaths in the Middle East or Africa. News is effectively now a form of entertainment, and people are 'entertained' by news pertaining to them, or about famous people that they find interesting. The problem is not so much with people being bad, but probably a mixture of the way society is used to seeing the news, and news channels and newspapers perpetuating this phenomenon by focusing solely on ratings, turning news and information into more vapid, soul-less machines that fulfil our desire to be 'informed' on the world, as long as it's not too unbearable to watch and we can still empathise with those affected. The below front cover sort of sums it up - nice little bit in the corner about the Paris attacks.. (OK not the greatest examples of news, but still, sums up what some people care more about reading)

The other sad side effect is the rise of the far-right wing, already flooding my facebook feed (I should really review who I am friends with), about how essentially we should be wary of all immigrants, especially muslims. That seems to be the general gist, and the comments on these posts then revolve around Muslims hating on Americans and the West saying how this was all caused by them and the invasion of Iraq, and then there is a countless number of people who blame the religion who supposedly facilitates this sort of behaviour. I hope both these very aggressive, yet easy to believe if you're gullible, views subside, and we return to a society which is on the whole, accepting of difference, and not recoiling in anger at things we don't fully understand. At least until I get my bloody visa approved, alright?? Only kidding. But yes, hope we return to peaceful times sooner rather than later. 

Californication continued

As I nervously await the judgement of the United States on whether they will allow me to pay my taxes to them, Sonam and I continued our travels. This began with a flight to San Francisco, firstly to check out the hustle and bustle of this exciting city, see some of the sights that came with that, see some friends at Berkely, and mostly to check out if it's really somewhere where Sonam and I could settle down.

With San francisco still being about the size of the South of England, we decided to rent a car, but in an effort to be economical, we downgraded from the Mustang to a smaller, older Nissan Versa, a car more suited to the trampy style I'd grown accustomed to in the UK. It was probably the first time I realised I was now in the 'spoilt' category in the car department; as I pressed on the accelerator for the first time, unlike the roar I'd gotten used to, it was a bit more like a wet fart. Anyway, snobbery aside, before we proceeded to explore the run-down streets of SF, we drove to Mountain View, a town known for everything but the view really, but more because it lays home to Google and Linkedin's headquarters. I can't quite figure out why its there, other than some sort of tax beneficial reason, because its a) ages away from the city and b) has literally nothing else to do there as far as I can tell, other than the odd spot of golf, or just watching a bunch of techies driving around on those google bikes you see in the film 'Internship'.  There isn't even a good cafe or restaurant, really, at least as far as I could tell - presumably because, based on Sonam's day there, they have full on canteens with an insane amount of variety and choice, and its all FREEE. Sure, they pay you less than some jobs, but I guess if its perks you're looking for, its perks galore. Free doctors on site, free food, free travel, great benefits when you have kids; essentially a wet dream for the corporate job people. All sound like good reasons for Sonam to work there, especially if I'm going to stay in the ever-volatile job that I'm going to be in again (fingers crossed)! Anyhow, I chose to not really bother with exploring offices, dropped Sonam off and ventured to the nearest Golf course. Aside from sucking majorly at golf, I also stood out like a sore thumb because I was surrounded by what seemed like retired or very wealth executives, who were talking mostly about their stock investments, where they were going to be playing their next golf tournament, what watch were they looking to buy themselves for christmas etc. It was funny, I felt once again like I was operating in a completely different world to these people, and although they were about 30 years ahead of the curve than me, I hope my curve leads into a slightly different direction. Well, except the golf, I wouldn't mind getting as good as those guys..

The next day, after a jog around the Berkeley Campus, we drove into SF city, and drove over the Golden Gate bridge. It was a beautiful day out, and we got some lovely pictures, especially from the pier near Fort Point. There were a load of Chinese men and women, presumably working for local restaurants, fishing away, pulling in fish by the bucket load, and celebrating loudly each time. They didn't however like getting photographed, as I found out when trying to take an artsy picture (see below). He yelled something aggressive at me, and I couldn't figure out what, but he was waving his arm at me and said something about "Fuck". Also, it didn't help he had approximately three teeth in total, making me stare longer. Oh well, it was time to move on anyway, and we spent the evening in Fisherman's wharf; a kind of touristy, but charming hub of restaurants and chains, along with a bunch of randomers in the street hoping to get paid for doing things that were really adding nothing to anyone's life. For example, the guy playing steel drums over some music that was fine on its own, and the guy 50 metres down the road doing exactly the same. Given I had seen zero steel drums while I've been in California, why didn't the second guy who came with his steel drums just go to ANY other tourist spot? Very odd. Also, there was a guy standing in the cold dressed as a dog, and making his two puppies stand there with him, while he just shouted "any money for the dog?". Again, very odd.

(Artsy sweary guy)

Berkeley was a great little town, if a little too studenty. And for a place that was studenty, there didn't seem to be anything open after about 10pm. But still, very beautiful all the same, and you really got a feel for being surrounded by academia. Also, while on my run, I stumbled across one of these:

It was a little Library effectively allowing people to pick up and drop off books as they please, for free. I think they should do that everywhere. Maybe it will encourage people to become more literate (Ok, I can't talk with my poor vocab and grammar, but still), and hopefully they'll stop saying "Literally" with everything, something that seems very common since I've been in America. "I'm literally dead" doesn't mean anything (well, anything possible at least). Nor is it OK to say "I didn't do nothing" whilst giving evidence in court. I feel strongly you should probably at least go to jail for a few days just for saying that. Ha, anyway, language snootiness aside, I just thought that was a wonderful idea, with so little downside.

The next day, we took our now trusted Versa and went east, in search of Napa valley where we were meeting my cousin and uncle who I haven't seen in 10 years. My cousin has had a baby, who is now a two year old little terror, but possibly the cutest kid I've seen in a while. All in all, a lovely reunion, set in one of the most blissful settings I have been lucky enough to sit in. I wish I knew more about wine while I was sat there, but oh well, I had a great time nibbling on cheese while sampling the different types, looking for the flavours described on the label, but really only grasping broad things like 'dry', 'smooth', 'sweet' etc. After a night in Sacramento with them at their beautiful home, we set off back to LA after possibly one of the biggest 'brunchiners' known to man. 

All in all, San Fran, run down and full of the homeless as it was, was an unforgettable trip, partly because of the location and the buzz of being in another proper city, but mostly because of the generosity and kindness of the people we stayed with, from Sonam's friends in Berkeley to my family in Sacramento. 

Back in LA now, we have decide to stay put for a couple of weeks, mostly because we have people visiting; one of our friends from Berkeley this weekend, followed by Sonam's parents the following week. Very much looking forward to it! This weekend, I'm hoping to go shooting finally with Simon, so hopefully one more thing off the bucket list, and the fact I'll be in one place for a little while means I can work on a couple of other ones that are a bit harder to do. Namely, volunteer work, and trying out a new, more 'real' job for a little bit. Also, hoping to be back in the eating healthy/exercising loop again, as we naturally drop out of it every time we go away. So, today was SoulCycle, the over-exuberant spin class. As expected, it was still full of woohooing, rhetorical questions and cheering, but I think it genuinely does the job in terms of getting you motivated, and pushing you to a decent level you'd probably struggle getting to on your own. 

One thing I'll sign off on is something I've noticed the past few days, firstly being in the student town of Berkeley, and then being on UCLA campus today with Sonam, but it genuinely is getting to a weird point how attached to their phones people are. Every student I saw was on their phone, even those hanging out with other people, mostly scrolling, texting, whatever it is. Maybe it's work related, who knows, and I know I am encroaching dangerous ground here; Sonam is always telling me I'm on my phone (although I can't really explain why considering I really don't keep in touch with that many people), I have an Instagram account, have recently become active on Facebook again, and am obviously writing this blog. So a rant about people being vain and living their life in public, however true, I'm almost as guilty as anyone there. But, I will say that I think it's just a worrying way to grow up, where interaction face to face is not normal, where hanging out with someone in person doesn't mean putting your phone away, where witnessing a magnificent new sight is all about capturing the perfect Instagram picture, or Vine, or Facebook profile picture, and then measuring it's success by the number of likes instead of by the beauty that is around. Anyway, for me, all of these tools are a great way of cataloguing our moments, essentially creating a simple to use, interactive diary to flick back to and relive these days when we are 75. But we can, and are going too far, and a little restraint can go a long way. Anyway, all it has really done is confirm that I am going to have my 4 day blackout, in December when the visa stuff is sorted. I think its important to do so occasionally, to help find that balance to an otherwise addictive way of life, and a chance to experience the true joy of why we are somewhere, why we bothered to fly all the way round the world to get away, and to not get sucked back in. 

Annnyyway, I hope to follow with another update soon, hopefully with more about what it's actually like to live here in LA, something we haven't really done for the time we've been on the west coast. 

Happy as Larry (David)

So as I await to be cleared for a visa to work in the US; a nervous proposition for a South Asian man attached to his beard, I have been distracting myself with living the life of a tourist again. Sonam and I have got our travelling shoes on again, and this last week we were accompanied by her younger sister, also killing some time before she starts working. So, the three unemployed amigos have been driving south this week, exploring more of California in all its sunny glory. Having Tanisha (Sonam's sister) around this week was great, she's easy going and fun to hang out with, but I feel so old when I talk to her. I find myself asking her about 'what kids her age are into' (what the hell?), or not knowing who these celebrities or 'famous artists' are, or just watching in awe as she tucks away a double bacon cheeseburger as I nibble on my no-cheese-no-fun-lettuce-with-more-lettuce salad. I just sit there with my metaphorical sour grapes and look for someone older to compare myself to. But that aside, great week!

As I eluded to there, after some heavy binging and eating in UK/Hamburg, I am back to eating healthy and trying to exercise a bit before the wedding. We enrolled to Soul Cyle, some spinning class thing which is hyped to be 'super amaaazing' (Insert LA accent please). It was basically just a regular spin class I found, just with lots of over the top 'woohoo-ing' from the class participants, and a distinct lack of air conditioning/fans. I'm not really sure why it's so hyped, but then I think the fact that I read some celebrities attend might be why it's developed such a brand. Don't get me wrong, its a really fun (painful) way of getting into shape, but it was kinda the same as any other spin class I'd been to. Well except for the instructor yelling retorical questions out to the packed class like 'whats everyone upto tonight?', or 'how're you all feeling?', or 'are you ready?!', or 'are you excited for halloween?'. Turns out the only correct answer to these oddly conversational questions mid class was to reply with 'Wooooooo'. The class obviously ended with a minute of self reflection and meditation, as everyone 'looked into their third eye' to find 'that goal that brought them to class today' and most importantly to 'give 110% both in here and out'. So many annoying things in those sentences, I won't even bother going into all that. Stripping away all the bullshit, I would definitely go back simply as that's the closest spin class, but I really wouldn't mind someone who actually told me when to turn up the resistance as opposed to asking me pointless questions. One thing I'm excited to try next week is a class called Box n Burn; a kickboxing class that does cardio and strength at the same time, and it'll be fun to take that class, especially as Sonam and my local friend Simon are going to join me. So, that accompanied by the weekly circuit training, occasional gyming, spinning and running should hopefully do the trick! Well it seems to be working so far, if the trick was to try to maintain exactly the same shape as I got here.. Grrrr

So one of the places we went to was Rodeo drive in LA, and checked out the surrounding Beverly Hills. It was as expected really; beautiful houses, lovely palm trees, ridiculously lavish shops, and men and women with botox dripping from their faces as if it wasn't designed for sunshine. Still, a great little day trip, and topped off by a trip to the Cheesecake factory, a classic 'TV restaurant' as I call it, one instantly recognisable to the tourist after years of product placement in sitcoms. Considering we didn't even get round to trying the Cheesecake, I was pleasantly surprised by how good the meal was, and how accommodative they were (restaurants in LA don't really tolerate substitutions or changes to their dish by us picky vegetarians), and surprisingly went up the leaderboard to one of the best places I've eaten at while I've been here. I'm sure people actually from LA would hate me saying that, but hey, credit where its due!

After a day or two sticking around LA, we decided to have a day trip to Laguna beach and San Diego. Laguna beach was an hour or so away from 'home' (more nomadic as the days go by), and about 20 minutes in Tanisha regretted her request of having the roof down in the car, as the wind of the Pacific Coastal Highway smacked her in the face and blew her hair in her mouth. Like I said, overrated. Anyway, Laguna beach was amazing; again more amazing to Tanisha as apparently there was some reality TV show many years ago that I have never seen, but apparently we could see Lauren, or Lizzy, or whosever's house from where we were on the beach. Still, as lost as I was on that front, I was blown away by the tranquility and simplicity of the beach. It is quite small actually, but incredibly beautiful, and its serenity was symbolised by the people sitting on their own, on benches that overlooked the ocean, simply reading a book, having a drink and enjoying the peace and quiet.

After a quick bite of delicious Mexican food (have to say, the best cuisine in general out here, if a little repetitive for a veggie), we made our way to sunny San Diego. We stopped off slightly before San Diego at a little town with a view called La Jolla (as I found, it is NOT pronounced how it is spelled, more La Hoya, apparently). This is where I first got a glimpse into the Halloween craze I was going to witness for the first time from an American perspective. I mean, halloween in the UK generally means a little bit of fancy dress (optional), maybe a house party if you're above 16 and trick or treating if you've got kids, and generally a few scary movies come out. Well, its kind of like that here, but on steroids. Think parade instead of house party, think 'sore thumb' if you don't wear a costume (I found that out the hard way), and think armies of kids strolling the streets for free candy. 

So anyway, La Jolla was superb. the views were stunning, and we got there just before sunset, so a perfect time to admire the vastness of the ocean. We also happened to stumble across a very friendly seal or otter, who was super keen to jump out the sea and pose for photos in front of us tourists. 

Next stop - San Diego! We approached San Diego as the sun was properly setting, making for some stunning pictures from Coronado Island, a little island separated by a very long and elliptical bridge from the mainland of San Diego. The views from there were amazing, and gave us a view of the buzz and excitement from a quiet and sleepy setting.

And when we made our trip back over the bridge, it really had a feel of a proper city, slightly different to the way LA feels as it is so spread out. It kind of felt like a Chicago with better weather. It had a vibrant and diverse crowd filling the city centre, mostly young people enjoying the very broad range of bars and restaurants available. I could really see myself enjoying that city, it felt closer together, more compact, like a proper city that I was used to being in, and yet still maintained that west coast beachy feel right on its edges. Maybe I got a slightly exaggerated view of the buzz, given it was the day before Halloween there were plenty of people dressed up and ready to celebrate. Still, I loved it, and it's definitely on the list of 'maybes' for places to live.

The next day, once errands were run, exercise trudged through, we decided to check out the next hot sport in town; Basketball! We looked for official Lakers tickets, but got after no luck on the official website, we got really lucky on Stubhub, picking up some VIP suite tickets for a bit of a bargain. So, as it turns out, Kobe Bryant, the face and complete brand of the Lakers, is still pretty amazing, but defensively they're pretty awful. they were up against the Dallas Mavericks, who as it happens, are relatively awesome. All in all, it really wasn't that close a match, but to my amazement, the stadium still packed out right up to the nose bleed seats, and no one really got up till right at the end. It seats a mere 20,000 people, tiny compared to a football game, but they play so often, they really don't need to sell out that big a stadium to rake in the ticket receipts. We had a really fun evening, all lined up in Lakers jerseys, watching the Dance cam pan across the crowd, the Kiss cam pressuring awkward couples, the cheerleaders, the half time entertainment acrobat, the american food, the celebrity spotting (Stevie Gerard), and the guy who tries to throw a basket from the half way line to win a ridiculous amount of money! A complete american experience!

So Tanisha left the other day, and Sonam has been back on her studies for today, so I was left to my own devices. A quick run later, followed by watching Man Utd scrape to a win, I went into Santa Monica to grab a bit of lunch. On my way back to the car, I saw a horrendous thing (well aside from my parking ticket); rain! It was drizzling! I noticed people looking to the sky as if Godzilla was coming, start sprinting to their car, or the nearest coffee shop, completely unprepared for this natural disaster. I decided to do the latter - I'd already got a parking ticket, I may as well make the most of it. Huckelberry Cafe is a name that rang a bell, a place famous for its brunch in Santa Monica, and as it was right next to my car, I decided to pop in and grab a drink before heading back. As I sat down, I encountered my first celebrity sighting; Larry David from Curb your Enthusiasm. And curbing my enthusiasm is what I ended up doing. As much as I'd have liked to approach him and get a picture, I realised he looked kinda grumpy, as he always seems to on TV, and plus I didn't really want to open with 'Hi, I'm a big fan', and then not really be able to back it up with actual knowledge! Anyway, after a sneaky picture and a coffee, I drove home surrounded by panicy LA locals, running from their Godzilla, probably trying to find shelter at home.

Oh, and finally, Urinal update. I keep seeing this, can anyone explain what the hell is wrong with the people making these?? Why are they designed for midgets?

Right, thats enough for now, off to San Francisco tomorrow, may the travels continue! 

Adventures of the Employed!

So, visa situation permitting, I have a job! I'm very happy, it starts in Chicago in the new year, with the flexibility to hopefully move wherever in a few of months. We shall see! Exciting times ahead..

It's odd, I think I had grand aspirations of being able to move horizontally at least into a handful of professions, but it turns out that even just 6-7 years into a job you are about as pigeonholed as you can be in finance. Ive never realised how specific job descriptions are when you aren't approaching through a contact:
-Bsc in Economics, Masters in finance, 5.25 -6 years of experience, must have worked with Latin American commodities only, first name must be Stavros, must be left handed, and able to read and write Arabic with a PhD in English Literature.

You get the drift, jobs are almost always advertised to target a handful of people, and transferability of skill is pretty much assumed to be zero. So, it seems I'll be an interest rates options market maker forever, or at least till I decide to study (no thanks) or till I'm happy to take a rather large demotion (more likely!).

Anyway, boring stuff aside, on the trip to go do the interviews in Chicago, Sonam and I decided to check out the city. Other than being very cold in comparison to LA, and with it looking more clumped together like a proper city, it definitely seems friendlier, more diverse (not just ethnically, but with people that seem to be living very different types of lives),and just generally feels more like home than in LA. Perhaps it's because its closer to what I recognise as a city, perhaps it's the people not all looking like supermodels or actors, but perhaps it's because it just seems peoples lives and goals seem more aligned to mine. Not everyone is focussed on healthy eating and exercising, or about appearance in some other way. And I'm 100% sure that's not true of LA either. It's just how the place makes me feel. I'm writing this on a flight to LA, and before I got on, I couldn't help but overhear a conversation between two aspiring models/actresses. Nothing they said was bad really, but they started with how random it was they were on the same flight, and before they even hugged, one of them took a selfie, presumably to instagram later. Then, absolutely none of what they said were things I could relate to; photoshoots, headshots, lines on their face (they can't have been older than 21), and various other OMGs I don't think warranted anything stronger than 'cool'.

Anyway, I'm not writing off America as a future permanent home, nor am I writing off the west coast, I'm just thinking LA isn't for me.

After a short trip to Chicago, and irnoning out the details for the new job, Sonam and I got back down to LA life, and if there is one thing that I can say LA does well is that it makes you feel like exercising. It's hot, sunny and it feels rude not to make the most of the outdoors. And my subsequent time in Hamburg and London, both cold and wet, really made me want to eat bad shit and sit somewhere warm.

Hamburg was a fun trip, specifically my Stag do, or bachelor party as they say in the US of A. I was lucky enough to have 11 people turn up, and as far as I can tell/remember, everyone had a great time. I got punished a little, as you'd expect on a stag, 'figure hugging' morph suit and excessive amounts of alcohol being two examples. The city itself has interesting bits to it; from an area that felt like a scene from "the Wire", to a beautiful lake and walkpath of cafes that provided the perfect location to forget about last night's shots, to a bizarrely open sex district that had families and couples wandering around just as much as the big group of guys you'd expect. All in all, almost like a concentrated version of everything that I know of Europe; beautiful, friendly, unembarrassed by boobs, industrial, ghetto and peaceful, all at the same time.

Before heading back from the Stag, I stopped over in London to sort out some work related things, and one thing felt really odd was not having a home there. I felt like a tourist visiting my home, but without the wonder and excitement of visiting somewhere new, but with an equal lack of belonging. I guess I felt a little homeless, which in a way both Sonam and I are right now.

As I head to LA, my own job worries mostly behind me, I feel really excited to be heading back, a) to have some sort of healthy routine again, but more importantly, b) to get on with that bucket list. I'm almost 100% sure I won't do a lot of what I said I would, but I'm sure it'll be fun trying.

I would drive 500miles, and I would drive 500 more... and I'd still be in the same bloody State.

So travelling around California has officially started, and over 1500 miles later, I am back here in our apartment in LA, kind of thankful I don't have to go anywhere for another 36 hours or so.

So just over a week ago, fresh from a mini trip to Santa Barbara (very quiet & chilled town) and a mini hike to nearly getting to the Hollywood sign (kind of got lost, and then it got dark), we went to our first American football game, a college football game between UCLA Bruins (Sonam's adopted university) and ASU Devils (Arizona State, the university of our friend Marissa who lives here). Anyone who went to University outside of the US probably sees university sport pretty much the same way as me - who gives a shit? Seriously, my parents probably wouldn't even turn up if I told them I was playing football or cricket for LSE first team. I imagine their first question would have been "But are you getting job applications sent? Make sure this doesn't impact your studies". No, I'm kidding, they aren't really the stereotypical Indian shoe-waving types. But I imagine me telling them about university sport might not even make it into the highlight of the phone call, never mind be on the highlights reel on TV. Anyway, I had my first experience of 'tailgating', and thankfully it isn't as creepy or predatory as it sounds. Its basically a piss up/pre-game lash, which instead of meeting at the pub, people meet in a garden near the stadium, and park up, open up their barbeques and get drinking for about 4-5 hours before the game, and 4 hours later, drive home (sounds safe). The stadium packs in around 90,000 people, and it certainly looked full to me. The parking area where the tailgating was going on was probably more packed than some Premier League football matches. I was totally blown away by a) how much drink driving must be happening, and b) how much these Alumni of these universities care, driving 6 -7 hours to have a barbeque and watch a game of football. I mean, it's amazing how much they still identify with their school, how proudly they still sing their university songs, and how much of a shit they seem to give about their school. It sort of fits in with the 'USA! USA!' stereotype of Americans, the incessant beaming pride they have when being part of anything. There is a real feeling of belonging to any University you end up going to, and 15 years later, people are still supporting their school, still have the university sticker on their car, and still buying memorabilia for the University for their kids, encouraging them to go there and carry on the tradition. It's so odd, because I personally didn't feel any of that, not even while I was there, but certainly not now. I have zero opinion on what LSE is doing now, perhaps not being a campus uni, and in the centre of the city doesn't help, but I know no one back home harping on about their university, and how it was amazing, and how they really hope the guys do them proud and win the season this year, or whatever else crap the Alumni should care about. It was a means to an end, and that's all it has ever felt like. Sure, some of my best friends were made there, but we bonded over things we had in common, not really through our pride for this amazing establishment that we call University. I imagine University is probably a means to an end in the US, but when you're charging up to $60K a year, you have to sell the 'experience', and that's what they do. Very, very well. And not being that way makes you kind of an outsider, I imagine. In the same way as not being a 'USA! USA!'-chanting-America-is-the-greatest American can raise a few eyebrows, I imagine the same is true for university pride. And that is just marketing genius. Schools have developed a brand, not necessarily with employers, but definitely with Alumni, and that Alumni will consistently validate their experience through chanting, buying merchandise and cheering on their College teams, doing plenty of marketing for them. Ok, ok, that was an incredibly cynically British way to look at American Unis, and the truth is, even if it is all a load of hype and unwarranted enthusiasm, it certainly provides a much more memorable and, I imagine, tale-worthy university experience. Sure, I had a great time at LSE, and have stories to tell, but that Alumni feeling and connection these people still feel towards their university and their ex-classmates is unrivaled in the UK, and is certainly something I'm envious of.

So, back to the football. Now that part, really, who cares? Apparently Arizona won which was a huge shock, blah blah.. We saw about 5 minutes of the game, took some pictures and proceeded to Uber it home.

One funny thing about being at an American college happened during my first tour around UCLA. It was freshers week, or whatever the equivalent is called here, and there is a road of 18-20 year old kids were handing out flyers for Frat/Sorority houses, handing out flyers for other clubs, trying to entice the cool & good-looking crowd into their house. You could see as you walked down the road, people in the group eyeing the other kids up, and then if they see someone who seems to fit their bill, they would approach and hand them a flier. Sadly, I was not approached by any group, and I can only take that to mean one of two things; I did NOT look cool enough to be a part of their group, OR I looked like one of the parents dropping off their kid. Either way, not great.

So, on to talk about our travels, and we have been far and wide over the last few days. From our humble home in LA, we drove to Death Valley, a beautiful landscape of dusty hills and yellow rock, and from there to a little town just outside Mount Whitney. From there we drove to Lake Tahoe, which is a ginormous lake, roughly 190 square miles, and made for a peaceful and relaxing day. After that we went to Mammoth Lake, a little skiing town where we stayed for two nights while we explored the Yosemite National Park. This park, although a little touristy now, was breathtakingly beautiful, and followed the common theme of this road trip; the vastness and scale of nothingness, intertwined with very simple yet elegant parts of nature, make for an extremely picturesque and breathtaking sight. Of course, 1400 miles of driving later, I'm not sure I am ready to take another picture of a rock next to some sand for a while.

Another thing about road trips, other than being really cool to look at, and having that fresh air blowing in your face as you drive, convertibles really aren't all that for long road journeys. Not only can you not really hear your music without blasting it, you can't really hear each other talk even before you start blasting the music, and its either baking your skin from the heat on a long drive, or its too cold to have the roof down anyway. Not to mention the annoyance of accidentally leaving some paper out when you lower the roof. So yeah, not the greatest of long journey accessories. Saying that, it looks like a dream compared to motorbikes. I mean, that just looks like a complete ball ache. Not just literally - you have to get into some sort of space suit to get started, you can't listen to anything on the radio or talk to anyone, not even the pour soul clinging on to you. And if you have headphones, I'm not sure theres an easy way to change the music. If you thought bugs on your windscreen were bad, I imagine they're even worse on your viser/body, and if you drop anything at all, that's pretty much ruined/broken. Plus there's the whole 'death' risk thing. Just sounds rubbish.

Here are some of the pics from out trip, but off to Chicago early on Wednesday morning, hopeful that something job related gets finalised..